365 Writing Prompt: Ha ha ha

Tell us a joke!Knock-knock joke, long story with an unexpected punchline, great zinger– all jokes are welcome!

Two monkeys stole a delicious loaf from a well  -known bread store, actually one of them stole it, the other one  was watching to see if someone was coming to alert his friend. The deed was done without any hassle.

The problem, there was only one loaf, since each of them did their part well of stealing and watching, they deserved to get part of it.

Decision was made they’d split it half and half, but who’d do it was the question, one did not trust the other. They managed to track down a wayfarer to solve their problem.

They explained to the traveler  their problem, they want to split the bread in half, but cannot trust each other to be fair. The traveler was a lean and thin man who seemed had not eaten for days. He agreed to do the job. He needed a pair of scales  so he’d be able to split it perfectly, none of the monkeys will get less than the other.

The stage was set the traveler sat in the middle with the pair of scales and the monkeys sat on either side of him. The monkey who stole the loaf handed it to the traveler. The traveler tore the loaf in half and weighed it, it seemed one side was heavier than the other, the monkeys got into a fight, “calm down ” the traveler said, “I’d fix it”.

The part that seemed heavier, the traveler tore a piece from it, the solution he said was to eat the piece which he did. He weighed it again now the other part was heavier. The traveler tore off the piece from the heavier part and ate it, this he thought was the only way to settle their quarrel.

The monkeys were concerned this splitting was not what they expected, the loaf was getting smaller, they wanted to get what was left of the loaf, and let the traveler continue with his journey. The man promised to do it right, and wanted them to give him  one more chance to do the job right.

While the hungry traveler was satisfying his tummy, the monkeys were plotting how to get back the pieces the traveler already ate, they winked at  each other, lifted the lean traveler and bounced him on the ground, the shock of the fall made the man sick, all the pieces of the loaf came out of his system.

The monkeys picked the pieces and the remaining loaf to their abode. There they ate piece by piece and congratulated each other for a job well done. “Say” one said to the other, “this was the best way of making our loaf moist and tasty!”

………………………… 🙂

DP Daily Prompts: 10,000 Spoons

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….when all you need is a knife might not be ironic, but it is unfortunate. Add your own verse,stanza, or story of badly–timed annoyance to AlanisMorisette’s  classic:

An old man turned ninety-eight

He won the lottery and died the next day

It’s a black fly in your chardonnay

It’s a death row pardon two minutes too late

And isn’t it ironic— don’t you think


It’s like arriving to dinner an hour late

The dining hall is closed, oh why didn’t they wait

You are hungry there is no food to eat

You see the cook giving his dog some treat

And isn’t it ironic — don’t you think


DP Daily Prompt: Roaring Laughter

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What was the last thing that gave you a real,authentic,tearful, hearty belly laugh? Why was it so funny?

The story I intend to write is one I heard from a gentleman who is the main character in this. Let me describe his looks first which will make it clear, why I found it so funny.

He was tall and had a rosy complexion, if anyone saw him would at once mistake him for an Englishman.

This gentleman whose name I’ve forgotten was a Pakistani. He was travelling to London by British Airways. An hour later the flight attendant served food, the gentleman was hungry and the food looked attractive, he immediately got ready to eat, he was about to put a morsel of food in his mouth when he felt a pat on his back, he looked around and saw another Pakistani trying to tell him something, he stopped eating and asked what he wanted to say. The man behind him said, “The food you’re about to eat is pork.”

The man thanked him and put the food away, the flight attendant wanted to know if there was a problem, he nodded and said nothing.

The gentleman stood up to stretch himself, he had no idea he was obstructing the view of a fellow passenger a few rows behind him. he looked right at him but the guy was angry and said something to him ,the Pakistani gentleman did not understand a word he said, to make him aware he didn’t know English he pulled out his shirt, i.e. “I am not an Englishman”, his plan did not work because his fellow passenger thought the guy was challenging him to a duel. He also pulled out his shirt and was coming towards him to punch him out.

The other Pakistani who was fluent in English stood up and saved the situation,he explained his friend does not speak English, he felt if he pulled his shirt out the man in the back row would understand.

The gentleman acted out everything  that happened that day, I must admit he was doing a superb job. I could not stop laughing for a while, it was an authentic ,real laugh which ached my belly.


DP Daily Prompt: Generous Genies

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Remember those lovely genies who grant wishes? Well, you’re one and you’ve just been emancipated from your restrictive lamp. You can give your three wishes to whomever you want. Who do you give your three wishes to, and why?

This is exactly what I was looking to become a generous genie now emancipated from my restrictive lamp, now I can give my three wishes to whomever I want. I have to think hard and long who best deserves my three wishes.

I have an idea, one day I saw a picture of a little girl in a mud house, she was beautiful and innocent, if I can give her the three wishes, I’d be very happy.

I know from watching her on TV no one else is as deserving as her. She is poor, doesn’t get the kind of nourishment her body needs, yet she has a sweet smile on her face.

I imagine her waking up every morning  wondering is there someone in this world  who can provide some food for me,perhaps her call is not answered and she goes to sleep hungry. I feel her pain,I know what hunger is, this month is fasting for us,we fast eighteen hours a day and cannot wait for sunset so we can eat something.

This little girl doesn’t have the luxury of thinking she’ll be able to eat whatever she wants after sunset.For her the sun never sets and there is no genie to magically give her food.

Every time I see her picture I think of all the food that is wasted around the world and the poor soul craves for the food that is thrown away by all these people who have so much.

I will definitely give my three wishes to this sweet girl who does not complain but only smiles!






DP Daily Prompt: An Ounce of Home

You’re embarking on a round-the-world-adventure, and can take only one small object with you to remind you of home.What do you bring along for the trip?

If I’m only allowed one small object on my year long round-the world-adventure. If I’m away from home for 365 days, it is impossible to take one small object with me, let me think some more about this.

I will have to take my family photograph. I have a lot of memories of the day this picture was taken. The photographer gave us our appointment for 11:30 am. Neither my husband nor I thought anything about the time we were given the kids were very young, the youngest one was less than two.

By the time the photographer got the place ready it was past lunch time, the youngest one came to me without saying anything she opened my bag and started looking, this was one of those days when mom didn’t have a candy in her bag. The poor child was so hungry she started crying, my husband blamed me for not carrying some food in my bag. The damage was done no matter how much I was blamed the little one’s hunger would not go away.

The clueless photographer as they all do thought she did not like her picture taken, the crying was getting louder and we were embarrassed, I told my husband to tell the photographer the reason she was crying, little thing like that made my husband stick to his pride, he was not going to say his child is hungry. I thought it was time for me to speak, I said,”She is hungry.”

The photographer apologized and found a lolly pop, gave it to the hungry child and calmness returned. this I think will be excellent, because I’d think of the day the young one cried.



DP Daily Prompt: You’ve got the power Post by Ranu


Imperialism (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I hope this power enables me to bring some law and order in the world. I would put an end to imperialism. The smaller and weak nations will  not be bullied by the imperialists.

Next I’ll make sure,there are no one homeless. No one hungry and deficient in vigour; sickly,feeble.

War will be unknown,people will not be afraid of getting killed in their sleep. All the weapons of mass destruction will be eliminated from the face of the earth.

Proper care will be taken of our environment. There will be no such thing as “Smog”.

Freedom will prevail.