Writing 101,Day Four, Serially lost

Today’s Prompt: Write about a loss,something( or someone) that was a part of your life, and isn’t any more.

I had just completed ‘Bachelor Of Education, from Punjab university”. I was back in Dhaka my original home. My next plan was to visit the,”M.Ed. Research Institute” to register for the course. I had no doubt in my mind I’d be able to since I had the prerequisite required to get in was a B.Ed degree which I successfully completed.

I was young and did not know that despite the degree there were other requirements, I did not have, thus I was not qualified to get admitted in the program.

I got an appointment to see Prof. Dr. Elliott, the head of the institute, I must have sounded quite bold, Professor Elliott looked at me, he smiled and said: “B.Ed. is not enough, you need teaching experience and you are too young.”

I remember pleading with him Please Dr. Elliott I said,”No one told me I need teaching experience, all they told me was get your B.Ed. degree and I did.”

My facial expression must have softened Dr. Elliott’s heart, he immediately said, “go to the admissions office and ask for the tests.”

I was delighted to know I may have  a chance if I pass these tests. After completing the tests I waited to know the outcome.

I was selected, this news made me so happy I would have screamed and told everyone who’d listen, I am selected.

Little did I know at that time, good and bad news travel together. I went back to the school I had just started teaching, I handed in my resignation, I told them I was accepted to study M.Ed. at the research institute.

The Principal must have thought, ” you naive young woman, you cannot leave, you have signed a contract.”

I felt dejected, I wrote to the institute, I’m not allowed to leave the job now, but I was certain I’d be able to register next year. I received a letter saying they’d hold my spot for next year.

I considered myself very lucky, I waited for the year to be over and I’d be able to start my studies at the institute.

One day I went to the staff room to get the newspaper, I had the habit of looking through the classified section, what I saw completely amazed me: The headline was, “British Council Scholarships”I knew there will be thousands of applicants but I felt why not I apply, I told myself, I did not stand a chance, I still went ahead and applied. I was always interested to study in England, but I had no financial backing, so I kept my feelings in check.

To my utter disbelief I received a letter advising me to come for an interview.

I presented myself accordingly, there were seven of them, all eyes were on me.I tried hard to look at the walls, I knew if I looked at any of them it would be all over,I would freeze, the questions continued to be directed at me. I know I answered all of them, but what I said or what they asked was completely blanked out of my memory.

My joy knew no bounds when I received a letter of acceptance and the tickets to fly to London, Heathrow.

I’d have to wait another year to register at the institute,was I feeling the loss of studying at the institute, not yet , they had given me another year to register.

Fate was playing a trick on me, I was back from London after a year, I should get myself registered for the course I thought, if I failed to go this time the Institute and Professor Elliott will give up  and I will not get another chance. This time I got married and this ended my quest for studying M.Ed.





DP Daily Prompt: But No Cigar

pad2015-s1.png (308×60)

Tell us about a time things this close to working out —but didn’t . What happened next? Would you like the chance to try again, or are you happy with how things worked out?

There was a time when I wanted to Study M.ed and prepared myself by completing B.ed.  I met Professor Elliott, who was the head of the research institute , I told him my reason to see him. He was a kind man , he told me I was too young and I had no teaching experience. The people they select were at least thirty five years  old   and I looked no more than twenty two or twenty three.

I had never seen rejection at that time. I continued to tell him I would be able to do it.He was impressed, he agreed to let me do the tests to find out how capable I was. I must have done well, they sent me a letter of acceptance.

But I was teaching in a school and they refused to accept my resignation. I informed the school authorities I’d like to join next year. They agreed.

The following year I received a scholarship to study in London, I could not give up this opportunity. I delayed my studies in the research institute by another year, they were eager to have me and were ready to have me a year later.

I had studied about destiny that we can change our destiny whenever we want,now that I think about it I’m sure it’s not always possible. I could not change mine, my aim to study M.ed was not happening.

This time it was my marriage which meant I’d move out of my country indefinitely.

I do believe in the phrase: “Man proposes, God disposes.”

I’m not sure whether I am happy or sad because I could not fulfill my ambition. Only thing that keeps me motivated and happy is , at least I am doing great with the education I have.

k: https://sabethville.wordpress.com/2015/03/26/dp-daily-prompt-but-no-cigar-2


My first two years teaching in a Residential school

Graph showing frequency (per century; blue lin...

Graph showing frequency (per century; blue line) and energy (brown bars) for the Richter scale. The graph is doubly logarithmic and both axes are numerically identical. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

My friend told me about a school.Her sister-in-law was a teacher who agreed  to make arrangements  for me to see the Principal.He was a tall man.He was one of those people,who claimed to be a Bengali.But couldn’t speak the language.I realized then why my Dad insisted,that we must know our mother tongue. “Learn as many languages as you can,do not forget your mother tongue.” I thought about my Dad, when I was  being interviewed,suddenly I heard Major Rahman,the principal calling me,I straightened myself.I was dreaming I didn’t hear what he was saying. I scolded myself for day-dreaming. The principal’s last words were,”And you cannot get married for at least five to seven years.”

I thought this isn’t a job interview,my friend wanted me to talk to him.He is already telling me how to run my life. At that point I did not have a very good impression of the man.However I felt since I have finished school.I must make myself worthy of doing something. Sadly enough I’ve groomed myself to be a teacher, My choice was very limited,either I make myself ready to teach in a school or take a job in a college where my sister was a Principal. Well,between my sister and Major Rahman, I wasn’t sure, who was a better choice. What can I say about my sibling,she was so bossy,I presumed Major Rahman would be a better alternative.

A few days later,I received an appointment letter from Major Rahman. I was selected.I was required to join almost immediately. I was cautiously optimistic about this job. I took the job.I was provided with a room with attached bathroom,and I would get my meals free. Wow,I mused,”my destiny has finally noticed me.” I was given a class of forty-two grade two boys.Grade two I thought,how difficult can it be!

Next day I went into the classroom at 7:00 am. One boy stood up without any hesitation,looked at me,with a mischievous grin on his face, and declared,  ” you are our sixth teacher.”  Hmm,I thought in my mind, “Did they swallow the previous five?” If so, I have a battle in my hands,without saying anything I started doing what I was hired for i.e  teaching. I recalled my mother who said once,’you know children and monkeys are alike,if you make the mistake of easing off they will climb on your head.’ I seemed to have a challenging job,but no,’these  six years old,nah I will put them in their place.’ At 10:am the bell rang for recess,before I had time to gather my thoughts together,there was a loud uproar and within seconds the room was empty. As if there was an earthquake which measured 8.5 on the Richter scale. The gym teacher who was next door came out,”Oh they are very bad,I have to come out of my office daily to discipline them.” Yeah in my mind I couldn’t help but think,” so you are here to rub salt on my wound.” well the day is not over yet,”I’ll teach these ruffians,who’s the boss.”

The day finally arrived I was waiting for,I checked my watch,there were a few minutes left for the recess bell.I went to the door and locked it.  Nowsher,who proclaimed himself to be a leader,didn’t quite fathom what just took place,he moved himself in his seat.He thought he’d wait to see what his next course of action will be.”I am a leader,I cannot back down,I will not surrender,or my followers will lose their respect for me.” Then the thundering voice nearly made him deaf,”if anyone moves from his desk there’ll be no recess.” Nowsher finally realized she is not like the five we gobbled up in two months.This one seems to be in a different league all by herself. If my memory serves me correctly,I was teaching in the school for ten days. It seemed to me as if I was there for decades.What was behind all this frustration? not my little pupils,not my colleagues,who is making my life miserable. I realized it was Major Rahman,who  day in and day out was scolding the teachers in the presence of the students. This wasn’t something I could tolerate.On the tenth day I wrote my resignation letter, I had to hand it to him personally. When he saw me he was as charming as he could be,as if he was a picture of a gentleman with all the angelic qualities.He read the letter,looked up and asked me,”Is this a resignation letter?’ I answered in the affirmative. “You’ve only been here for ten days,why do you want to quit?” ‘I don’t like it sir,’I replied   “No, it is not a good reason.” He handed  back my letter. I was unhappy,but had to stay,it was a government school,it wouldn’t bode well for my future jobs. In the meantime I received a letter from the Research Institute, I was selected for the M.ED. course.It seemed I got my rejuvenation back,I can finally quit this place. My disappointment was at its height when I heard the verdict,I am only teaching for two months, the school will not release me.It was heart-breaking,I had to digest my pain and anger and calmed myself.I’ll try next year.They cannot stop me from leaving.It was the same story.

I was teaching as usual,it seemed these were different boys. But they were not,they realized they have to listen to me or else life can be difficult. Most of the boys were in the same dormitory as me.I only had my own room.They saw me from five in the morning till eleven at night. We ate in the same dining room, breakfast,lunch and dinner.The boys always kept an eye on me.They wanted to see what I was doing with my food. For breakfast it was bread and tea for me and the children had milk. The waiter thought he was very helpful,he would put a generous heaping of butter and topped  it with several tablespoons of jam. I noticed because the door of the kitchen was open, there were swarms of flies greeting us.I didn’t like the scenario especially when they sat on my bread and got stuck because of the sticky jam. Every morning I sat and removed the butter and the jam,but lost my appetite,so I did not eat.This happened for days.I was sick.I was told to see a doctor,when the physician recommended I have to stay in the hospital,I lost my nerve I told everyone I was all right.I made a quick exit from the hospital to my school. The kids were happy to see me.I started my regular teaching. Sometimes destiny gives us a jolt to remind us that too much relaxation  can be harmful. I was relaxing for maybe ten minutes,it was a week-end the ward boys were supposed to make sure the kids were taking their shower without any problems. It didn’t happen the entire floor was flooded with water and the boys were on their fours sliding,suddenly two of them collided with each other and one boy broke his two front teeth. The maid came running to my room to report this mishap. I was at a loss what am I going to do.In walked Major Rahman,summoned me,where was I when this happened.I told him I was in my room relaxing. At this point,I knew if he tries to be crooked with me.I’ll quit. Amazingly enough he said nothing.I must admit I grew very fond of the boys.They tried their trick once and afterwards they were normal boys. There was one other incident while I was in that school.I was invited to watch the sports in my old college.I got permission to go. I was hardly outside the gate of the school,the same kid who broke his two front teeth broke his arm. The kids told me as soon as I got back. They said I should always be with them,otherwise bad things happen when I’m not there.

Memories of school days - geograph.org.uk - 933744

Memories of school days – geograph.org.uk – 933744 (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Then came the moment when I received the British Council Scholarship. ‘I will have to move some mountains to leave this place,’ I thought. I suppose in the end God took pity on me and probably said,”Poor child has suffered enough,I will have to show her the green light!” The principal tried one last time,he said “we’ll send you,reject this scholarship.” I said, nothing, I kept remembering the saying,”A bird in hand is better than two in the bush.” I finally left that school.I only missed the innocent boys who tried to gobble me up,like the previous five.Later on ,I was their most favourite teacher!